I’ve been running for a long time. Not very fast (6 mph on a good day for maybe a half mile) and not very far (my longest so far has been a marathon) but I run. I’m pleased to say that I’ve inspired some to start running, some to keep running, and still others to take up running again.
But what is it that makes me run? What is it that gets me out on the road or on my treadmill? Why am I a runner?
In no particular order, here are 10 things I love about running. I love
the endorphins
that it feeds my inner planner (training plans, training paces, trips for races)
that I can catch up with television shows on my treadmill
that a good run leaves me feeling strong, powerful, and invincible
that a bad run leaves me looking forward to the next run in hopes that it will be better
the “me” time
the sound of my footsteps on the pavement or my treadmill
the meditative nature of my morning runs
the stress-relieving nature of my evening runs
that some days I run further than some people drive
This list is a good reminder of why I run but it also helps me appreciate the fact that I can run. If I could no longer run, I would miss all of these things. It makes me want to hop on my treadmill right now, even though I ran in a 10k this morning and it’s 2230 right now.
What do you love about running? What would you miss about running if you couldn’t run again?
Time is an interesting construct. Memory is an interesting construct, as well.
When I was running the NWM 26.2 last October, I distinctly remember thinking, “I’m not ever going to do this again.” I remember thinking “never again” when I was caught up in the gear check scrum where I thought I was going to die from suffocation or claustrophobia, whichever came first. I remember thinking “never again” as the marathoners split from the half-marathoners and I realized that I had a long way to go. I remember thinking “never again” as I ran past the finish line on my way to another 8 miles or so of joyous running.
I remember thinking that I wasn’t going to be one of those people who said, “I’m never going to do this again” during the race only to turn around and say, “I’ll do better next time.” No sir, not me.
When I finally finished, though, I remember thinking, “Well, I couldn’t do any worse next time.”
And as the hours turned into days and the days turned into months, that niggling thought continued to percolate in my brain. I knew I could do better if I trained properly, if I took my training schedule seriously, if I didn’t think about gutting it out on race day. I knew I could.
I hadn’t intended to sign up for the NWM virtual half-marathon – I wanted to concentrate on training for the April half-marathon that I had in mind. When I saw the announcement that all members of the largest team would be given an automatic opportunity to register for the NWM – no lottery – I scoffed silently. When I saw the Facebook posts that encouraged everyone to sign up with Team Victorious so that would be the biggest team, I sneered inwardly.
And yet somehow, I wound up signed up with the Nike+ challenge, registered for the NWM virtual half-marathon, and a member of Team Victorious.
This week I received an email from NWM letting me know that as a member of Team Victorious I was entitled to register for the NWM in October without having to go through the lottery. There are a few hoops to jump through but that’s to be expected. I was so excited to get that email. “Yes!” I thought, “thank goodness I registered and that I signed up as a member of Team Victorious!”
As I think about my excitement over that email and compare it to my mental anguish while I was running last October’s NWM 26.2, I have to laugh at myself. And I have to marvel at what amazing things time, space, and memory are.
Time heals all wounds. Time soothes the hurt spirit. Time rebuilds the crushed soul.
Space gives time the room to work. Space allows different experiences to take place. Space lets old thoughts out and new thoughts in.
Memory can be selective, allowing us to either focus on the good or the bad. Memory allows us to consider the possibilities, the what-ifs, the might-have-beens. Memory can hurt if you dwell too long on the bad things without thinking about the possibilities. Memory can help if you remember that what you did in the past doesn’t have to define who you are in the future and what you can accomplish in the future.
My selective memory has focused on a few things – that I could have turned in a better time if I had trained better and been more prepared for the hills, that I really enjoyed the race once I emerged unscathed (except for my missing Nike+ SportBand) from the gear check scrum until the last 8 miles or so, and that entry is lottery-based so it certainly wouldn’t hurt to try to enter. In the intervening weeks and months since the 2011 NWM 26.2, I’ve admitted why the marathon, particularly the last few miles, were so miserable for me – I tried to run a marathon with less than half-marathon training. So time has given me the benefit of honesty with myself as well as the courage and determination to try again.
What’s your memory pushing you away from or pulling you towards? How much time needs to pass before your wounds have healed? What are you going to try again? Do you need to build up courage or determination or both to do it?
Sunday, 15 January 2012, was the inaugural Nike+ Women’s Half Marathon. This was a virtual race – each participant would run a half-marathon at any time from 12:01 a.m. until 11:59 p.m. on Sunday, 15 January 2012, and log the run with Nike+. Participants could run anywhere so some runners who were already signed up for a race let that race do double duty.
I hesitated about signing up for this race. My runs lately have been to build a base for the half-marathon training that will start in a couple of weeks. I didn’t want to sign up for the race and then not be able to finish it or injure myself in the process because of my inadequate training.
I compromised by signing up for the Nike+ challenge because I could log the miles without paying the entry fee. After all, was the finisher’s bracelet worth $40? Then, last week, I reminded myself that I could do the distance, that I had completed the distance on minimal training before, and that I could walk to the finish if need be. I decided to go for it and registered for the race. I was official.
I chose to do my run on a treadmill, in the evening, after the football games. Since I hadn’t been training for this race, I decided to treat it like a long run and go at my long run pace instead of pushing my race pace. I thought that I would do a run/walk ratio of 9/1. That’s 9 minutes running, 1 minute walking. The morning of the race, I changed my mind because I knew I was going to be running at just a twitch above my long run pace and decided that my run/walk ratio would be 14/1.
After watching the Green Bay Packers lose miserably to the New York Giants, I put on my running clothes, laced up my Asics Gel Nimbus 13 – the next pair of shoes in the rotation, not my usual race shoes – popped my Nike+ sensor into my bean pod, and strapped on my Nike+ SportBand.
One small hiccup, though. I recently moved my treadmill to the garage and the idea of staring at a blank garage wall for 2+ hours was a bit daunting. I don’t have a television out there (yet!) and I’m anti-i so I don’t have an iPad. I’m also cheap so I don’t have a tablet. I had hoped to use my Nook to watch movies on crackle.com – not the best solution because of the Nook’s lack of flash – but even that idea was stymied because my treadmill is now too far away from my wireless router to get a good enough signal to connect. Luckily, I had my phone and was able to watch old episodes of NCIS during my time on the treadmill.
The run went surprisingly well given my lack of training. I stuck with my run/walk ratio of 14/1 and ended up pushing the pace well beyond my easy run pace because I was feeling so good.
I ran until my Sportband read 13.12 miles, ended my run, and then walked for a few more minutes to cool down. When I logged my run, though, instead of uploading 13.12 miles only 13.05 miles were uploaded. That, of course, freaked me out because I wanted to be counted as a finisher! In retrospect, I should have kept the Sportband on while I walked my cool-down – it’s what I do during my regular runs, after all.
Post-race soreness wasn’t too bad and I was able to do an easy 3+ miles on Monday.
I’m glad that I signed up for the Nike+ challenge. I’m glad that I registered for the race. I’m glad that I have a treadmill. The successful completion of this event makes me look forward to the half-marathon in April.
Confessions of a Treadmill Runner 